Recently, my colleague Xiao Liu told me that she had encountered a troubled thing. She said that every time the child did the wrong thing to educate the child, her mother -in -law had to block the child horizontally. The mother -in -law also accused Xiao Liu of being ruthless, saying that the child was so sensible that it was not necessary to be sensible.Go online.Whenever the child was taught, he ran to his grandmother, as if encountering a savior.Due to her grandmother’s care, Xiao Liu ended in failure every time he educated his children.As a result, the child could not be unprecedented, and he didn’t listen to Xiao Liu at all. Xiao Liu asked me what to do?
I am too touching about Xiao Liu’s situation. I said that the generations of generations, with children, I really realized that this sentence is too right!The intergenerational relatives are a very deep, delicate and unspeakable feelings.Grandpa and grandma really loved the grandson.I was afraid of falling in my hand, and I was afraid of melting in my mouth. Not to mention that the grandson wanted toys, it was the stars and the moon. If they could pick it down, they would be willing to give it!In addition, the common phenomenon is that young people go to work. The elderly take children at home. The children have the most time to get along with the elderly, and their feelings are naturally deep.The intergenerational relative is really an unclear phenomenon. I believe that most families have the phenomenon of the elderly who love their children.
My son was brought by grandma, and I was too able to appreciate this phenomenon that Xiao Liu said.When the child was picky when he was a child, I punished him not to eat. As a result, my grandmother felt sorry for her grandson secretly feeding.Sometimes the child has made some small mistakes, so I hit his ass, and my grandmother guarded my grandson, and I thought that I was too cruel to the child.There are too many such examples. I always feel that it is not easy for the elderly to bring their children, and I am embarrassed to criticize her mother -in -law to protect her children and worry about hurting her heart.As a result, every time I teach my son, the little guy asked my grandma for help, and did not listen to me at all.
I don’t think I can go on like this, otherwise the kid will not be overwhelming.I know that her mother -in -law is distressed her grandson. Her starting point is good, but the method is wrong.So I thought about a way, bought a parenting book for my mother -in -law, and said that reading this book must be good for grandson.As soon as the mother -in -law heard that she was good to the grandson, she looked at the book every day.The old man could not protect when the parents were educating their children alone.It was really effective. When my mother -in -law told me that when I educated my child before, she had made mistakes. The experts said that this is very unfavorable to the growth of the child. I am happy after listening!Since then, when I was educating my son, my mother -in -law simply hid in the bedroom. I couldn’t see it. My son also realized that my grandmother would not protect him, and slowly corrected some bad problems under my education.
What should the old man do when you educate your children?Provide the following small methods:
1.The old man hurt his grandson, and he is understandable. This is understandable.The elderly may not understand some educational methods. She only knows that her grandson cannot be wronged.Therefore, we must do the ideological work of the elderly in advance and communicate with the elderly. It is said that such a blind protection will only affect the growth of the child. If you do something wrong, you will not be able to do it.If you want your child to become a material, we must trim the leaves from time to time. We teach the child to grow up for his healthy growth in the future, not abuse.Patiently doing the ideological work of the elderly, maybe the old man could not accept it at first, but told her about scientific parenting knowledge every day.
2.Do not blindly blame the elderly. After all, many elderly people take care of their grandson as their own focus in their later years. If we rush to accuse or ask the elderly to change their educational methods, it will hurt the elderly’s heart. After allIt is just that the method is wrong. It must be patient with the “care of the short” and slowly enlighten.”
3..Buy a book for the elderly parenting for the elderly, or let’s read this content for her, and give some examples of successfully educating children.Ears are sturdy, and believe that the old man will support us for a long time.
4. 4..Reach an agreement with the elderly and establish a united front. We must not be busy with education. The elderly are busy dismantling the platform. When we discipline children, the elderly should not intervene.When we are educating our children, let my mother -in -law hide far away so that she will not have the impulse to obstruct our children, and she will not be annoying.
5.If the child has made a principled error, even if the elderly interfere, we must continue to educate, adhere to their own opinions, and let the child understand that you do not violate the bottom line.Relief.
The departure points of parents and the elderly are love children. You must not be accused of the “short protection” of the elderly. When communicating, you must first admit that the elderly love the child and unite the front line with the elderly.When educating children, the elderly cannot stop, and the other cannot teach you in front of the child. Third cannot deny your authority and correctness in order to set a unique standard for the child.Otherwise, if your family interfere with interference, the child’s understanding of the standard will have errors.
In short, in terms of educating children, parents must communicate well with the elderly and reach consensus. They cannot hurt each other because of love. They also hope that every child can grow up in a healthy family education atmosphere.